Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mother Schmother

If I see one more wish for a Happy Mother's Day, I swear I will pull my hair out.  Where does all this love and kindness and well-wishing for mothers everywhere come from?  Every single status update on Facebook is "Happy Mother's Day to all of you mothers out there, blah, blah, blah". Honestly, I hate holidays for this very reason.  Everyone else is always living it up.  They have great stories of what their husbands or children have done for them.  My brother, for he took his wife and children to a river park outside of Nashville with their bicycles and a picnic.  They all frolicked and rode bikes during the brief breakthrough of sunshine that seemed to come through just for them.  My brother makes it a point to make holidays for his wife special.

My sweet, dear husband, whom I love more than anything, was not raised in a home where holidays were anything special.  His father is not a kind, loving man like my father is.  His father is a selfish, self-centered, egotistical jerk who thinks of little else but himself.  My husband didn't have a good role model.  Even though he tries, and sometimes really comes through, he just doesn't know how to make special days special.  Our anniversary and my birthday are a day apart and they usually come with little more than a card and a meal.  The cards are there because I told him that he would lose his left nut if he ever forgot to get me a card again after the first Mother's Day.  He fell asleep yesterday at 4 pm and didn't wake up until 4 am because he has been working ridiculous hours.  But he still got up at 4 am and went to the store to get a card for me from him and my son before getting to work at 5.  Sure, he put it off to the last minute, but he went out of his way to get it done and I appreciate that.

Still, nothing ever really measures up to all I hear from others and what I expect.  What would I want him to do?  I don't know.  We went to my parents house and Patrick went outside with Cade and spent forever playing baseball with him, something he wouldn't have done only a few short months ago.  Truly, this Mother's Day really has been the best because I am in love with my husband and our lives together are moving in a really great direction.  I should suck it up and be grateful for that.  And after writing this and really taking a look at all that has changed around me, I think I will.  

But I still don't want to hear another word about this stupid day.  I'm just glad it's over.


  1. What do you do for fathers day? also what do you expect for mothers day?

  2. My mother used to hear what her sister and their daughters used to do for them, and would hate it that we wouldn't do shit. I never wanted to to because I felt pressured, I didn't really feel like appreciating my mom. Then finally I got older and realized how much my mom meant the world to me.

    So now I do do stuff.

    But first, she got OVER that whole thing, the whole suffering every birthday and mother's day saying her kids didn't love her.

    She realized we simply didn't show it, but it didn't mean we didn't love her.

    And now, that's when I do. Because I don't feel pressured.

  3. Ugh, not to go back to what I was whining about yesterday (see my Takebacks post...cause I take it all back), but I usually make Father's Day and birthdays, etc. all about him. I buy him whatever he has pointed out that he wants, I wait on him, allowing him to do as little as possible for the day.

    For me? I was thinking yesterday about how a pedicure would be a perfect, inexpensive gift. And I suppose I expected Patrick to read my mind on that.

    From now on, all I want is to enjoy my son and show appreciation for my mother, because I am pretty sure that is what it is all about.